How to be happy

   How to be happy

(Let all be happy and peaceful,  सर्वे भवन्तु सुखिन )

                               Illness signifies misery and health signifies happiness.

The wise should closely examine what is appropriate and aggregable in contrast to the inappropriate and disagreeable, and pursue the former in seeking virtue, wealth and pleasure. Without these three values theirs can be no happiness or unhappiness in the world.

"Love - The greatest keeper of health & Happiness".

"The best and most beautiful thing in the world cannot be seen or touched. They must be felt at the heart, and that is love and happiness."

Hatred, jealously, pride, vanity, passion, anger,, infatuation are the few negative sentiments are to be overcome and one has to practice endurance, spiritual strength, understanding, love for all. This would lead to peace. One has to understand that under all creation one life force is existing.

"Forgive and Forget"

"One minute of anger weakens the immune system for 5 hours.

One minute of laughter strengthens the immune system for 24 hours."

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"The people should  adopt a healthy diet and right conduct and should be  wholesome in action."

BE KIND VERSION OF YOUR SELF TO BE HAPPY.

Introduction

Happiness is the state of mind.

Happiness is a feeling of pleasure and positivity. When someone feels good, proud, excited, relieved or satisfied about something, that person is said to be "happy". Feeling happy may help people to relax and to smile. Happiness is usually thought of as the opposite of sadness.

                                     "Happiness is a journey, not a destination."

Be scared of attachment. Every attachment will break your heart and make you sad.

कभी किसी को मुकम्मल जहाँ नहीं मिलता..
कहीं ज़मीं तो कहीं आसमां नहीं मिलता...

wonderful words. so true in this present day world. its very very true that no one gets the "everything in life" , there is always some emptiness left even with all the power and fame.

xxxx

Happiness is an emotional state characterized by feelings of joy, satisfaction, contentment, and fulfillment. While happiness has many different definitions, it is often described as involving positive emotions and life satisfaction. 

Five key items that contribute to positive thinking, which, in turn, results in happiness: being grateful, being optimistic, practicing acts of kindness, relishing in how lucky you are, and using your strengths
The term happiness is used in the context of mental or emotional states, including positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. It is also used in the context of life satisfaction, subjective well-being, eudaimonia (blessedness) , flourishing and well-being.

It is the scriptures that come in and offer a helping hand to  refine our life style in order to enable us  to achieve goal of our life, the attachment of health and happiness.

We are like any other being and we see god in everybody. So the goal of life is self realization. Then only supreme peace and happiness is attained.

Love is a powerful energy which  pervades the  entire universe. Love sweetens every human endeavor. The more love we give the more we are relaxed. The nervous system channels this love. When one loves he feels fresh and his approach is natural.  One feels joyful. Joy is oxygen.

As you get older you find out that true happiness is not in how much you make or how much degrees you have, or how big your house is  or how fancy your car is . Its finding Peace and joy and calmness in your life that will soon become the most important thing to you. Your family is what matters to you. Love is what matters to you. Things that are of quality not quantity.

                                            "Happiness is a highest form of health"

Be fit. Lead a healthy lifestyle. Keep the following 6 simple rules in mind for healthy and happy living.

1. Healthy food habits

2. Regular exercise

3. Adequate sleep

4. Personal hygiene

5. Growing up in harmony with nature

6. Spending time / holiday together

You have the power to hurt yourself or to benefit yourself…. If you do not choose to be happy no one can make you happy. Do not blame God for that! And if you choose to be happy, no one can make you unhappy…. it is we who make of life what it is. – Sri Sri Paramahansa Yogananda

"Forget it and forgive."

"Happiness lies within."

Mind : Be creative, Read, Problem solve, Take Breaks & Learn new things.

Body : Drink Water, Deep breathing, Eat Healthy, Relaxation & Exercise.

"Believe in forgiveness, that will make you happy."

Causes of Unhappiness

• Desire and attachment : There is tremendous craving for sensory objects after they have been consciously abandoned, which is so hard to resist.Without being attached to the objects of sense,person should learn to enjoy them with the aid of the senses which are completely under his control. By the practice of sense of withdrawal (pratyahara) person wins freedom from attachment and emancipation from desire and becomes content and tranquil.
• Impacted Memory : The holding fast of the impressions of objects that one has experienced. There are people who live in their past experiences, even though the past is beyond recall. Their sad or happy memories keep them chained to the past and they cannot break their fetters.
• 5 Causes of disturbances of mind 1 Ignorance. 2 The feeling of individuality which limits a person and distinguishes him from a group which may be physical, mental, intellectual or emotional. 3 Attachment or passion. 4 Aversion or revulsion. 5 Love of or thirst for life, the instinctive clinging to worldly life and bodily enjoyment and the fear that one may be cut off from all this by death. These causes pain, remain submerged in the mind of a person. As long as these thoughts are not controlled or eradicated, there can be no peace. A person should learn to forget the past and takes no thoughts for tomorrow. One should live in the eternal present.
• Ill health or sickness : Physical health is important for mind development, as normally the mind functions through the nervous system. When the body is sick or the nervous system is affected, the mind becomes restless or dull and inert and unhappy.
• Mind -Restlessness A listless person is like a living corpse for he can concentrate on nothing.
• The unwise, the faithless and the doubter destroys themselves.A person should have faith in himself.
• A person should be free from hate and sorrow.
• Words : Words are the most powerful deadliest weapons we have.While some pierce the heart others trigger anxiety and self doubt, and some may even kill relationship. Living in a highly socializes and digitized era one should be very careful while using social media not to hurt other.

"Happiness induces health".

Remedy

To overcome the obstacles and to win unalloyed happiness there are several readies. The best of these is the fourfold remedy of

1. Friendliness Maitri
2. Compassion Karuna
3. Delight Mudita
4. Disregard Upeksha

"The wise should therefore cultivate the habit of sound sleep which promotes happiness."

Friendliness or Maitri : Maitri is not merely friendliness, but also a feeling of oneness with the object of friendliness (atmiyata). A mother feels intense happiness at the success of her children because of atmiyata, a feeling of oneness. Therefore cultivate friendship and oneness for the good and turn the enemies into friends, bearing malice towards none.

Compassion Karuna : Karuna s not merely showing pity or compassion and shedding tears of despair at the misery of others. It is compassion coupled with devoted action to relieve the misery of the afflicted by using all the resources physical, economic, mental or moral to alleviate the pain and suffering of others. One shares one's strength with the week until they become strong. One shares one's courage with those that are timid until they become brave.One makes the week strong enough to survive.

Delight Mudita : Mudita is the feeling of delight at the good work (punya) done by another, even though he may be a rival. Through mudita the person saves himself from much heart-burning by not showing anger, hatred or jealousy for another who has reached the desired goal which he himself has failed to achieve.

Disregard Upeksha : It is not merely a feeling of disdain or contempt for the person who has fallen into vice (apunya) or one of indifference or superiority towards him. It is the searching self examination to find out how one would have behaved when faced with the same temptations.It is also the examination to see how far one is responsible for the state into which the unfortunate one has fallen and to all. the attempt there after to put him on right path.The person understands the faults of others by seeing and studying them first in himself. This self study teaches him to be charitable

Cleansing of mind of its disturbing emotions like hatred, passion, anger, lust, greed, delusion and pride. Still more important is the cleansing of the intellect of pure thoughts. The impurities of mind are washed of by adoration or devotion or ( bhakti) .

The impurities of the intellect or reasons are burned off in the study of self.(atmachintana) This internal cleansing cleansing gives radiance and joy. When one is benevolent, one sees the virtues in others and not merely their faults.

• The presence of rich and satisfying social relationship, spending meaningful time with friends and family and life partner is neccessary for happiness.

The key to being Happy is a non-insisting mind, non-complaining mind, and a non-comparing mind.

Healthy food habits

The best way to develop healthy food habits are as follows. Avoid the preparation of foods that you know are not healthy.

Eat fruits and raw vegetables from an early age.

The list of unhealthy foods includes all cold drinks (especially colas), fast foods which have too much salt and saturated fat, cream biscuits, sweets, coffee, cakes, pastries, chewing gums and potato wafers. Cola drinks appears to be strongly associated with calcium deficiency in children because of their high phosphorus content. Association of cola drink with bone fractures has also been reported in the journal of adolescent health. Drink sterile water. The best way is to boil it.. The best source of pure water is, of course, coconut water and the water contain in fresh fruits.
Eat your meal together with the family. Chew your food together. Swallowing of food is not healthy.

                                                "Expectations gives us pain."

Regular Exercise

Do yoga with friends. Exercise has to be done regularly. Each cell of our body needs oxygen. Every muscles and joints needs movement. Inactivity leads to complications secondary to loss of calcium from bones and can give rise to various symptoms like general weakness, boredom and constipation. It has an adverse effect on fluid balance inside our body and on the endocrinal as well as muscular, skeletal, respiratory and cardiovascular system. It can off course, lead to problem like obesity with all its attendant risk.

Moderate physical activity in the early years reduces the risk of heart disease later in life. It is recommended that  a school age youth should participate daily in 60 minutes of  moderate to vigorous physical activity that is appropriate for age, enjoyable and involves a variety of activities. Swimming and cycling is good. But weight bearing activities are important to prevent osteoporosis particularly of lower limbs and spine.

Exercise can take any form. Encourage the child to take part on sports like kho-kho, kabbadi, badminton, tennis basketball, football, hockey, swimming,  bicycle riding etc. One can get involve in wrestling, judo, karate or athletics. One can go for brisk walk, jogging or just going up  and down the stairs of a high rise building.

                                               "Cause of pain is desires. So minimize them."

Surya Namaskar

Hence all exercise during Surya Namaskar revitalize the energy centers of the body and thus tune a person to one of  the most important source of cosmic energy- the sun. One can live a life of eternal happiness and experience the bliss, beauty and harmony in creation.

The dividing line between the 'I' and 'not I' is the cause of all conflicts and confusions.; is eliminated and all pure love, compassion-the most powerful force in the whole of creation is born within.

Surya Namaskar can lead to experience of this force of  oneness with all that is , and get a tremendous happiness out of life.

जीवन में अगर खुश रहना है तो स्वयं को शांत सरोवर की तरह बनाए, जिसमे कोई अंगारा भी फेके तो खुद ठंडा हो जाए ।

Adequate Sleep

Adequate sleep is a must for happiness. Victims of inadequate sleep present problems of tiredness and lack of attention in school. Sleep deprivation during school days can lead to  inattention in school, especially if the school starts at the early in the morning. Young school going children need 10-12 hours of sleep at night. Teenagers needs 9-10 hours of sleep. The bed time must be fixed, except perhaps during the holidays.

Even parents need adequate sleep. An occasional late night is alright.People who follow "

"Early to bed and early to rise" set the right tone for healthy living.Children must be helped to go to bed early. Once you get used to the freshness of early morning, you will never want to miss it.

"Appreciate those who love you.

Help those who need you

Forgive those who hurt you

Forget those who leave you."

Personal Hygiene

It should be practiced from an early age.  Care of the skin, nails, teeth eyes and genital areas is essential. As these are the vehicles for many infections.

Moderation is key : Don't get obsessed with cleanness.

                                                             "Don't respond to negativity."

 

Growing up in harmony with nature

Try to develop interest in nature from an early age. Go to beach and let them play with the mud, sand and water. Its important for everybody to have some outdoor activity everyday. Visit garden as often as you can learn to appreciate the beauty of nature and its wonders. Watch together the stars on a clear night,  rainbow when rain alternates with sunshine.. And the changing hues of sky when the sun is setting. Appreciate the vastness of universe from the hill station.. Think the role of nature in keeping us alive. Feel sunlight and water as your best friend. 

                                                       " Do work that brings joy."

Spending Time / Holidays Together / Family Time

The primary purpose of taking a holiday should be to spend quality time  together doing "fun things" with your family. Holidays gives us an opportunity  to understand our children and spouse better. It gives us more time to introspect and decide if our priorities in life need to be reordered.

Holiday enable us to explore our country and our world.

When you next decide to have a holiday , do not forget the main reason for taking a money and time  for doing so. Holidays need not be expensive affair. 

Spending time together helps the child enjoy the company of  her parents, to come closer to them, to feel more free to share her problems with them if need arises and to grow to become a happy  and healthy individual. Spending time with the family like watching cartoon film or adventure films, playing indoor games together.Children can also use the holiday time to pursue some hobby.

"Read & Write more."

Pursuing hobbies

Any creative hobby will give you happiness. Like writing a blog,story, singing song etc.Hobbies provide children with a good means of self expression. If your child shows interest in dramatics or crafts, help her join a summer camp that has theater workshop. In Mumbai, Prithvi Theater and the National Center for Performing Art conduct these. In Delhi Bal Bhawan is good for children. At the Prithavi theater, children from 9-16 years of age can join. Nehru Center in Mumbai also organizes. The Kaleidoscope summer camp for the 5-15 age group.

Among the hobbies which children can pursue are music, dance, gymnastics, sports, painting, swimming, martial arts like karate and judo, reading, nature study, bird watching, astronomy, yoga, photography, chess, stamp collection or growing plants in a garden or in terrace.

                                                 "Keep calm, Be Positive, Enjoy life, Have fun."

                "The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts."

Practicing forgiveness for peace and positivity

Forgiving somebody for hurting you is not an easy task. However, the decision to forgive someone is extremely powerful and can be of your own benefit.. Its important to let  go off the anger, resentment and regret that  comes from the hurt in order to experience true piece in your life.

Being able to let go off pain open the doors to new possibilities and new relationships.

Learning to let go  and move forward with your life is one of the most  valuable life skills you can have.

Take control, set boundaries

Remember that just you have chosen to forgive someone who has wronged you does not  make the hurt that they imposed on your acceptable. It is okey to feel angry, to feel shattered and to feel betrayed. Emotions are  neither right or wrong, they simply exist.. Being able to forgive someone makes you the bigger person and allows you to take control of your life and set boundaries for yourself. These boundaries are important because it will set the bar for what you are willing to  accept in your future. You are allowed to say I've forgiven you but i will not accept this behavior ever again.

Find the bright side

What are the advantage and disadvantages of forgiving someone?  Think about it , it might help to  physically sit down, grab a pen and jot down your ideas.To be able to  see a physical list of  pros and cons will help you to find the best reasons you should forgive someone for hurting you or causing you pain.

Find the bright side. I might be  easy to say , "I forgive you." but in reality it takes lot more  than that  to attain that  mental state. Try hard to find a positive outlook  on forgiveness.. it doesn't  happen overnight  but with time, perhaps even with  the help of  professionals, your decision will  be to your own benefit.

 

Love yourself

Include some me time in your every day schedule. Do things that makes you happy. Being able to practice self love  will provide you with the much needed time to think about what is best for you and what you should forgive others. It is important to consider that  a big part of loving your self is owning who you are  and accepting how you feel.Take the time to figure this out so that you can realize  your true values.. When we take the time  out to accept, love and forgive ourselves we can do the same for others as well.

Others

"A mathematical formula for happiness, There are two ways to be happy: improve your reality or lower your expectation."

Active listening 

Strengthen your relationship by becoming a better listener, Ask questions, express empathy, and refrain from judging, are giving advice.

Traveling

Keeping Pets

Feed your Brain

Tell someone you are proud of them

Eat your favorite food

Count your blessings

Remember that happiness is a journey

Talk to happy people

                         "Give without expecting a get."        

Entertainment

All of like to be entertained. A month old child enjoys hearing some soft, recorded music or lullby  sung by her parents or someone else. A two months old looks at her mother and waits to be entertained by a broad smile in response to her overture.

A father and child laughs together, share a joke,  fly a kite or build sand castle on the beach, have a bath together, read a storybook, fool around each other.

                                         "Think Less, Feel More

                                           Frown Less, Smile More

                                           Talk Less, Feel More

                                           Judge Less, Accept , More

                                           Watch Less, Do More

                                           Complaint Less, Appreciate , More

                                           Fear Less, Love More."

Toys

Toys make children happy. Balloons are their favorite. Below the age of threes months child enjoys watching a moving object with bright and different colors within a distance of about 30 cms

(12 inches) So a mobile to be hung over above her crib is an investment worth making. Some of these toys also play music.

After she crosses 3 months mark the same mobile can be hung up else where. Music  may also be played but make sure it is soft.

Between 3-6 months a child likes to look into a mirror.She loves music. You can let her handle a rattle, light, plastic rattles with rather big ends are preferable to expensive silver rattle with smaller end. Colorful posters and soft toys are added attractions.

Between 6-12 months baby will still show interest in toys now its time for floating toys, wooden blocks, magazines and cardboard books with bright pictures, balls,squeeze toys, a spoon and a cup or a saucepan, cars, buses, and trucks, push-along toys, a rubber hammer and a toy telephone.  At this age children also love to play 'peel-a-boo' with older people.

Between 1-2 years hardbound picture books with stories, blocks, wooden animals, dolls, teddy bears, buckets and spades, vehicles, simple jigsaw puzzles and bottles and boxes of different size are popular with the children of this age group.

Between 2-3 years Crayons and papers, plasticine, a handbag, a toy cooker, or a tea set, large wooden beads to string, playing with sand, playing ball with others and riding a tricycle interest children and make them happy. At this age , they like to build castle in the sand, dress up dolls, and pour water into container. It make them happy.

Between 3-4 years children love fleet of vehicles like ambulance fire engine airplane and scooter. Model animals,garden tools, a rope ladder mask a model village or a housing colony would interest the child.  An easel  may be given to a  child who shows interest in coloring. At this age exhibit a vivid imagination. They will imagine a presence of people who are not around. They may like to play at being mummy and daddy, or doctor and patient.

Between 4-5 years table games with dice(ludo and snakes and ladder), and carom starts interesting the child. Give them material to draw and paint Allow them to have scissors with round edges and old newspaper to cut. Let them make a models of chair or tables with plasticine or play dough.

Between 5-6 years spinning toys are favorite at this age. A skipping rope may also be introduced. A child can be given a thick needle and thread.

Between 6-7 years a child may like to ride a bicycle or to join you are his friends in kite flying.

How to be Happy ?

Don't compare your actual self to a hypothetical self. Don't drawn in a see of 'what if's. Don't clutter your mind by imagining other versions for you in parallel universes. Where you made different decisions. The internet age  encourages choice and comparison but don't do this to your self. Comparison is the thief of joy. You are you. The past is the past. The only way to make a better life. The only way to make better life is from inside the present. To focus on regret does nothing but turn that very present into another thing you will wish you did differently. Accept your own reality. Be human enough to make mistake. Be human enough not to dread the future. Be human enough to be well, enough. Accepting where you are in life makes it so much easier to be happy for other people without feeling terrible about yourself.

Sometimes you have to eat... Your Words, Chew your  Ego, Swallow your Pride & Accept that you are Wrong. It is not Giving Up, it is called Growing Up.

10 Simple Ways to Find Happiness

1. Be with others who make you smile. Studies show that we are happiest when we are around those who are also happy. ...
2. Hold on to your values. ...
3. Accept the good. ...
4. Imagine the best. ...
5. Do things you love. ...
6. Find purpose. ...
7. Listen to your heart. ...
8. Push yourself, not others.

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